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CarefulYou don't read my words
They are too sad for you
"why are you never happy?" you ask
It isn't important for you to read
Write something happy...
Make me happy I will
Make love to me nightly I will write of seduction
Bring me flowers
I will write of loves abiding promises
Kiss me like there is only me
How I will write of the wonders of a loving man
Treat me like garbage
You get depressive writing you call it
You create what I write what do you expect
My emotions are not fake they are the real me as much as I let out
Maybe you should pay attention....
Creature of the nightTragic tears and tormented fears
Wake up and realize your life is fading
Someday you will find comfort in the stars
One day you will surrender your barriers
Face your demons and demolish your fears
Tortured creature don't run away
Walk awayYou're creating a void between us
Learning how insensitive you are
Drives me far away from you
Sick of the daily whining when others are begging for work
You work to feed your family
This is not about you anymore
Yet you find ways to twist your words and create more stress
You want this your way
You will find yourself alone
I know there is nothing wrong with me
You have burdens I know I can't relate
Yet you tear apart everyone who loves you
Do you think this is the only way to feel special
Alone is all you will find
Escaping is all I want at times
You are blinded to all my sacrifices
Days are getting longer
Time is getting tired
Body is breaking down
Tears flowing daily torments of being with you
Lost in transitFalling apart at the seams
Close to shattering completely at any moment
Loving you is a journey of pain and chasing ghosts
Sucking the life out of me at times
I don't know what to do anymore
A cross roads seems to be coming
Worried I leaped when I should have ran
Easier to flee, but this challenge is becoming impossible
Maybe this is punishment for some lost evil done
Now I am becoming distant
First it was you're smothering and talking too much
Now why are you distant and not talking....
I feel trapped in this asylum
Am I the only sane one, or am I lost in time....
Take me awaySingle tear rolls down
Don't pity me in my despair
Wishing to have someone to relate
Feeling always alone no matter where I am
He has his dark secrets and I will let him have them
Why do I?
Not a clue in my crazed brain
My self esteem somewhere buried in a tomb
Never can I find it
Insecurities always following me
Is it my childhood or my past relationships
I just want someone to care about all the stupid shit I say
I just can't seem to keep old ghosts out of my heart
Thinking its my fault
Does time heal wounds seems not in my world
Tracks of these tears seem to be relentless
My body tired but feelings of love towards others strong
I will have to suffix for now on the love of them
He will have to wait
If my heart gets damaged so let it be ...its already damaged goods...
BreatheAnd then there was you
How far have you come to be here this night
Awake in your arms I find my collapsed world
Picking up this soul and rebuilding
Safe...was a faraway world
I am letting pieces of this wall come down
Crumbling to the floor I try to keep from boarding it back up
Healing from a lifetime of hurt
You are inside me showing me caring
I am trying not to wait for the other shoe to fall
Holding onto my sanity I try to stay positive
My breath caught in my chest as you caress my hair
ZenHow I fall from this cliff
Enjoying the descent of the insane
Willing to keep going on everyday
I rise with one thought and never seem to end the day
Always mind racing to figure out where I went wrong
Journey's old these days
Fearing things have gone stale
I just keep thinking how will this year end
How do we find our soul
I escape in my books I read
Finding solace in fake loves and lives
Journeying to the other worlds I find my oceans
Escaping into my music I see my mind calming
Relaxed now I find myself
LiesWhat you fell in love with you never read anymore
How you used to critique and be full of passion
Now you are pulling from me
You never seem to read me anymore
Maybe I am becoming boring for you
I seem to have been just part of your fantasy world
A fun hour with a safe distance between us
You never have a fear of losing my affection
Merrily you widdle me along in your lust desired world
Do you know you are breaking me apart
Tearing me down little by little
I think you know all too well my love....
Find meFairytale that is what I found myself believing
How much of a fool could I be
Learning all feigns are the same
Taking me in showing love unguarded
Or so I thought
Nothing but a lies and deceit is what he fed me
How trivial we think things are when time is quiet
Things are at peace so we think
Till we find that under the mask is a beast
Never will I find what escapes my grip
Always picking up my heart forever tortured
Can life be so complicated in a short breath
Do you even care what I go through
OH yeah you answered that you don't
So now what have I become that woman struggling to hold on
Fighting for what...love .. is there such a thing
Books have lost their capture
Music a theater to my bleeding heart
Smile for me though pity would end it all
My tear tracks are never ending right now
Maybe there is hope ....but right now there is darkness circling my soul
Dead and GoneA cold that chills to the very bone
Sitting in my hearse alone
My coffin cramped and lined with satin
I can't believe that this could happen
One day here, the next I'm not
Soon my body will be laid to rot
The preacher will speak the sermons of old
And the people will cry, or so I'm told
Then they'll lower me down into the ground
While not even children make a sound
And a handful of dirt each will give
Remembering the life that I lived
Then all I'll be is a thought
A memory, a shot in the dark
And if they think back on me
They'll remember how I lived so free
And they'll remember how I loved so strong
And how I loved forever long
And even though I'm no longer around
And my corpse lies rotting in the ground
Know the sun again will rise
And you can try to feel alive
So please don't cry a single tear
My love, please know I'm always near
RosettaThe ways that my lips and eyes
curve and shine
are a language that whisper my secrets.
I have been decoded
(nothing is sacred).
Your gaze softens mine,
every time every time every time...
I do not appreciate
betraying myself under your
laughing, hazel eyes
and the heat of your torch.
You know me so well and I want you
to make me furious,
to give me the excuse
to let you be the créme de menthe
that cools the fire on my tongue.
The Wind Cries Your NameThe wind cries your name
As I feel your touch while I peacefully fall into sleep
I see your face when I dream, and it sets my soul at ease
The wind cries your name
I see your reflection in the mirror as you embrace me from behind
The warmth of your touch makes my breath deep and my exhale so calming
The wind cries your name
As I get ready to start my day with you
I love when you smile as you watch me undress
The wind cries your name
I ask you questions about life
I ask you questions about us
And As I wait for your answers so patiently
I hear the wind cry your name again
And then it whispers to me, with a respectful tone
"She's not really there"
I Thought You Loved MeI thought you loved me,
I thought you cared.
But when you kiss me,
You bite me.
When you hold me,
You bruise me.
When you clasp my hand,
You break bones.
When you touch me,
You slap me.
I thought you loved me,
I thought you cared.
Taking Back The DayCandy tastes bitter
on this arbitrary day.
Kisses look like
little wrapped bombs
in aluminum foil;
no X's & O's for me -
I'm not hungry anyway.
But I cannot stand
the sight of flowers.
Carnations are too sweet.
Roses are too dusky,
and far too inviting,
and without shame.
Stamp 'em in a card
and give 'em to your lover,
then burn all the rest
for the sake of the rest of us.
Let's have a bonfire of the vanity
of this 'gifts for sex'
Saint Hallmark's Day.
Now gather round ye lonely,
and warm your hearts;
we are taking back the day.
Don't worry, lovebirds,
we'll throw it back
after our blood mingles
with strawberry champagne,
but as the number 14,
because a day belongs to no one.
afterLifePassion not soon lost
Hailing sweet crimson honey from flesh,
Severing the root of life
Once cut, twice burdened, death will only
Whet the appetite for Torment's final course.
Hellish dreams, not for waking
Hours, yet living are the grotesque visions
From the Word; the fiery Chasm no more
A distant sense of dread, surreal
Like a written word brought to painted canvas.
A painting titled Inferno
Stricken voices echoed from my cell mates
In this eternal prison on the Burning Plains
And soonest did I know why.
Grim were the fates of those
That Death had brought to cross and dwell in that nightmare realm.
Lo, my eyes opened, the Dark flooded
With Light not from flames tormenting;
For Death had yet not come.
But the crimson manacle remained
A monolith for what death would bring,
Lest I forget to live.
Day for a DepressiveDragging along is a simple thing
here there is no pleasure;
Walking numb without a course
Pity's PartyCome on, just look at me,
I lost Happy to Misery,
In a dance with Pedigree,
Amidst the sirens of Apathy,
In the mosh pit in my head.
Can't you see how fun I am?
When my Pride's on the lam,
Sipping Sorrow like Baby Cham,
Falling foul of Honesty's scam,
On the dance floor in my chest.
I look so grievously good,
Doing what Agony should,
And what Depravity would,
In command of the red regiments stood,
On the catwalk of my wrist.
I can hear them pounding,
Watching and surrounding,
Laughing and floundering,
With Pain and Woe hounding,
In the nightclub of my gut.
My guests are saying to,
Cheer no longer pulling through,
Despair sticking like glue,
With Sin ready to sue,
At the opera in my throat.
Watch me as I lose control,
As Loneliness takes it's toll,
Filling out Insanity's role,
Joining Death's lost shoal,
Inside the crypt of life.
See my eyes flutter and fade,
Marching in the Black Parade,
Finding shelter in Hate's shade,
And losing all I had ever made,
As the curtain closes,
To a dozen
The Long WayThe long way 'round is all I know,
it has eaten my time, and time has cheated my heart.
It is true that I am night blind and frightened of shadows,
yet, I have found my way back to you.
I have missed your face, and dear god I swear
you look more handsome than when you were young.
Dashing still and dear to me always,
you are my knight in shining armor.
I cry lakes of late, deep enough to drown in,
because you share my feelings.
This should send me flying, defying gravity -
who needs wings of wax when I have you?
Yet, you are tied to someone who is not me,
and her weight pushes me under.
"What bad timing you have,"
you whisper softly,
as I sink slowly down and away.
I swim night blind in the deep,
searching tirelessly for my way back to you.
Will it be the long way this time around?
Not much is clear below sunlight or reason.
All I can say is, "I love you, I love you,"
and hope against hope that you will hear the echo.
My heart is yours; you have made it fearless.
Day to dayWE don't talk
you don't look me in the eye anymore
Words linger on my tongue "are we done?"
You differ from any talk of us apart
What does that mean?
Why can't you tell me how you really feel?
Why is this so difficult?
Close your eyes and tell me
Write it down
I need an answer and you are keeping me waiting for too long....
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More